Diary of an old cheeser

Hi there! Like other blogs, this is my chance to wax lyrical (some might say talk utter cr*p) about a) what's happening in my life b) all of my pet obsessions in particular music, tv, movies, books and other generally connected things, quite often of the retro, old and "cheesy" variety. Hence the title of my blog. Feel free to leave a comment if the mood takes you. There's nothing like a good chinwag about one's favourite topics and besides I love to meet new people! Cheers, Simon

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Celebrity spotting with the Cheeser


Last night I was out with friends in a bar close to Moorgate and in there was Victor Ebuwa from Big Brother!! That's him above. Although when I saw him he was actually looking relatively ordinary in jeans and a bomber jacket I think. And he didn't have the pencil-thin moustache.

In case you didn't know, Victor was one of the contestants on Big Brother 5, which was broadcast in 2004. He was a bit of a straight-talking, sometimes aggressive fellow and somewhat arrogant too. I confess I didn't like him much back then. At the time of BB, Victor claimed that his nicknames were 'the milkman', because he always delivered and 'Mr Slick', because he always got the job done. Not too modest, then. Other charming statements that he came out with were: "My DNA stands for Dis Negro is Attractive", "Mess around with me and I leave you R.I.P.", "Shizzle my nizzle. You get me?", not to mention his chat-up technique with women: "I have an extremely large penis. I just pull it out."

Lovely. What a fine specimen of male heterosexuality he is. I suppose Victor was capable of some degree of self awareness however, as he also described himself as being like Marmite - because people either loved or hated him.

Anyway. It was rather bizarre seeing him in the flesh right in front of me, as it would be running into any famous person or celebrity. As I said he looked relatively normal and actually rather subdued and quiet, nothing like his TV persona. Having consumed several glasses of wine, I was brimming with courage and went up to him to ask: "Are you Victor from Big Brother?" To which he replied: "Yes". Great conversation eh?! I actually don't remember much of what we said but it was brief - I did ask him if he'd seen the recent BB and he said he hadn't watched it atall. Then I said something like I was sorry for having bothered him, but he was fine about it. So that was that.

It's kind of difficult making conversation with famous people I guess. Do you comment on their work, the films, tv programmes, music or whatever they've done and are famous for? As they talk about that kind of stuff all the time in interviews and elsewhere, they probably get bored sick of people asking them the same kind of things. So the alternative is to talk about ordinary, "normal" stuff. But how can you make small talk with someone well-known, acting like they're your mate, when you are both strangers? Odd. That's why I kind of ran out of stuff to say to Mr Ebuwa.

Anyway. The excitement of it all was almost too much for this Cheeser to take.

Now. What I really want to know is - who was the last famous person YOU saw for real? What was the experience like? Did you dare to talk to them? What did they say and do? DO tell!

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  • At 5:39 pm , Blogger Deemer said...

    Interesting. I don't know this person, but then again reality tv stars are a dime a dozen these days. Maybe he wasn't as tough as he seemed on tv and you scared him? You know how people turn things on for the cameras?

    The last famous person I met was also a reality tv celebulite. It was Micheal from last season's Project Runway. Do you know that show? He was launching something with Starbucks--i think it was design your own t-shirts at starbucks.com. Anyway, he was very friendly. Unlike the chump you met at the bar.

    Maybe I'll blog about the celebrities i've met. Thanks for the inspiration!

  • At 2:24 am , Blogger TimeWarden said...

    It depends how you define celeb? I guess it depends on whether or not you know who they are! The most recent was a guy who, before his stroke, used to play drums for 50s pop star Billy Fury, and latterly The Wurzels.

    I don't find it difficult approaching people in the limelight, if I think we have something in common, and probably wouldn't bother if they were, say, a footballer!!

    I've met quite a few celebs in my time. It might sound like name-dropping were I to list them all, though, like deemer says, would make for a good post as long as it didn't come across as bragging!

  • At 7:25 am , Blogger Steve said...

    I once sat opposite Peter Vaughan on a train from Glasgow back to Leamington. I didn't dare speak to him as he looked so gentlemanly and imperious but we did share exasperated glances as a mother in our compartment let her kids run absolute riot.

    Most recently though David Barby came to give a talk at the Art Gallery where I work and shook my hand. Not sure if that's anything to be proud of though...

  • At 1:58 pm , Blogger matty said...

    Cool! It is very difficult to know what to do or say in such circumstances.

    ...I always say and do the wrong things.

    Most recently I wee'd in a public urinal next to Devendra Banhart. I think I already told you about it. While we were both in mid-wee I asked him if he was he.

    ...I'm so cool! LOL!

    Jeff Bridges once called me a "mother fucker" in Boston. I was only taking a picture of his camper van on set of some lame movie he was shooting there and I heard his voice yelling about someone -- turned out to be me who was the "mother fucker" so I was asked to leave the area or be escorted off.

    I didn't even get to the take the picture of his name.

    And, then I once found myself in an elevator with Dan Ackroyd. Silence. So, I looked at him and said, "Wow. You're Dan Ackroyd."

    And, he said, "Yes. I am."

    So, I then said the most intelligent thing I could think of, "You're really quite tall."

    To which he said, "Yes. I am."


  • At 9:32 pm , Blogger Old Cheeser said...

    Deemer - Yes, well British Big Brother probably would have passed you by. Yes Victor did seem very subdued indeed - you could be right! All attitooood in front of the camera, and not so much out of the limelight!

    I have vaguely heard about Project Runway, something about models? Although like you and BB, I have never seen it.

    A post about the celebs you've met is a great idea! I should have tagged people, thus forcing them to write something, shouldn't I?

    Tim - Well I wouldn't call Victor that much of a celeb! That's so funny that you met the drummer from The "Ooaaaah" Wurzels! Did you tell him you had a brand new combine harvester and you'd give him the key? (Maybe not...)

    That's good that you're not shy about approaching famous people - I find it kind of weird!

    And I say, WRITE THAT POST, Tim! Would love to see you name dropping to the max! Plus of course I'm curious to see who you actually met.

    Steve - Ooooer, Peter Vaughan! Well he certainly came across as imperious in some of his acting roles e.g. in the Kate Bush "Experiment IV" vid and even in "Citizen Smith"!

    Oh dear, showing my ignorance here but who is David Barby??

    Matty - Ignorance x 2 - who is Devendra Banhart? Okay I'm too lazy to google this person - or David Barby for that matter. Honestly!

    That Jeff Bridges story is scarey! But that's the way with actors and famous folk sometimes - they hate having their privacy invaded. And can turn out to be pretty grouchy and humourless in real life.

    And as for the Dan Ackroyd story - hilarious! Rather like me and Victor.

    As I said - how do you know what to say??!

  • At 6:27 am , Blogger TimeWarden said...

    Funnily enough, we did talk about the very same song! In passing, I mentioned how it originated with Melanie's tune, "Brand New Key", and he reminded me that The Wurzels' version got to number one in the hot summer of '76.

  • At 7:35 am , Blogger Steve said...

    Here you go OC, a link to David Barby's terrifically cheesy web site: http://www.david-barby.net/!

  • At 11:16 pm , Blogger newplanet said...

    Victor BB5? Hate (x100) him!!! To this day. What a twonk.

    I met Shahbaz from BB7 in a petrol station in Glasgow. He told me I was lovely. Well thank you, you crazy nutjob!

  • At 5:33 am , Blogger The Sagittarian said...

    I bumped into Richie McCaw once. Literally. I was doing that thing that us gals do, saw an item in a dress shop and just turned and walked not into the door but into the very lovely lad (he's the All Blacks captain). I haven't washed that side of my body yet....but it was easy to know what to say "Shit, sorry" popped eloquently outta my gob before I even realised who he was.

  • At 10:20 pm , Blogger Old Cheeser said...

    Tim - WHAT a coincidence! I must be pyschic or something...

    Steve - Aaaah an Antiques man. And you're right, that is a damn cheesey website (far cheesier than my blog with all those lurid, tacky colours - lovely!)

    Newplanet - Shahbaz eh?! Weren't you the lucky one getting propositioned by him! I can't imagine why you didn't go on a date. Nutjob is the operative term to describe him, not to mention self-centred and totally annoying, as he was on BB!

    Amanda - I just looked Richie up on the net - mmmmmmm!! Hello!! Not bad atall. A shame you're married eh, you could have taken advantage of the "accident" in the dress shop! (Although I can't help thinking, what's a strapping (presumably hetero) rugby player doing in a dress shop?!)

    Oh and did you know he has a blog (like most good people):



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